On April the 18^th 2022, I was standing in the kitchen when I leaned forward and had a sudden sense of a shock that ran straight through my body. My girlfriend at the time called 911, and I was rushed to the emergency room.

I was woken up by a nurse practitioner rubbing my sternum painfully. He began to interview me about what happened and I mentioned I just started to have seizures a couple years prior. I heard a monitor start beeping and he looked at me concerned and said I needed to concentrate on breathing because my oxygen levels were low. So, I listened to him.

Suddenly he started getting very concerned and said something like, “Hey, come on, pay attention to your breathing.” I thought I said pretty clearly, “I am.” I worked as a CNA previously and with autistic kids and had to teach them how to regulate their breathing as well. Yet he didn't respond to me. The nurse practitioner called my name again. I thought I said, “What's wrong?” and he started to shine a flashlight in my eyes. He told the female nurse there that my gaze was myotic and to catheterize me. While she was attempting to do so the doctor started to rub my chest hard again very painfully, and I yelled, “Ouch,” but he didn't respond at all. Then, when the female nurse catheterized me, I yelled, “That effing hurt! Stop it!” but no one responded. I kept asking them, “What's going on?” but no one responded to me. There were alarms going off on the machines that were attached to me. He told the nurse to get a medicine I hadn't heard of before. I had gone to the hospital for seizures previously and had an extensive history in the medical field so I became worried. I said, “What’s wrong?” one more time before I saw a huge flash of white light that quickly captured my whole being.

Within only seconds I felt completely at peace, as I never had before in my whole life. I felt there were others around but I really couldn't see anything. I just knew they were there and were happy I was there. I felt a complete understanding of the universe in that moment, in a way that I cannot describe to this day. I seemed to be there just existing peacefully for too long of a time to explain, too.

Then I began to think of my children and their mom. Though we divorced I was still very much in love with her. Through a sort of communication, I said, "I want to go back." I very distinctly remember the response from a woman being, "We didn't expect you to make it to 40 years. You really don't have to go back. You made it longer than anyone else did."

I still have no clue what this means to this day, and it has led me down a path of reading about cosmology, physics and spiritualism of all forms. But I digress. I insisted I go back, and they slightly reluctantly agreed.

Next, I woke up completely nude, with only a bedsheet covering me in a frigid room. I looked for a call button to summon the nurse, thinking I had a serious seizure and wanted to get at least a blanket, but there was no call button. I got up from the bed and the catheter was still attached to me but it wasn't attached to a collection bag at all. My body was surprisingly okay and I slowly walked around the room looking for a call button, when I noticed someone in a bed in the room.

I thought they were just asleep so I cautiously looked around them for a button but didn't see any. Then I looked closer. They only had a gown on without any bedding. They weren't breathing. I was extremely confused. I took in the room more and noticed there wasn't a partition separating us, there were absolutely no call lights, no phones or television, no windows, and the lights were very low. I realized just how cold the room really was and didn't know what to do.

I opened the door and the hall was completely empty. Just closed doors. It didn't look to be a part of the regular hospital. I called out, "I need help!" but didn't hear a response. I called out a few more times before I grabbed the bedsheet and wrapped it around myself and started wandering the halls for about ten minutes until I finally found someone. When I did, they asked which room I was in and I said, “I don't know. Somewhere down there,” and I pointed in the direction I came from. I distinctly remember their face looking utterly bewildered. They said, “No, you couldn't have,” and I said, “There wasn't a call button or I would have waited.”

Thats when she called for the ER department to come get me. I was later transferred for observation to another department. When they were going to release me, I asked about my clothes and she said they cut them off because I urinated on myself and I wasn't looking too good.

When I got back to my girlfriends’, she looked completely shocked to see me... I still can't explain everything fully and am coming to terms with it all...